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<p id="reply-intro">On 2020-01-06 22:44, R. Anthony Lomartire wrote:</p>
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<div dir="ltr">So I recently landed a job working in COBOL on HP-UX. It's been a trip!</div>
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<div dir="ltr">Oh, man. You just had to go there. Why, yes, as a matter of fact, I *do* have a COBOL on HP-UX story. I was working at a startup c. 2002, and we wanted to use the PointMan ERP system on our HP-UX hosts. (Linux wasn't yet an option for PointMan.) So I, a relative HP-UX neophyte, ordered COBOL for some thousands of dollars. I got, in a FedEx envelope: one (1) sheet of paper with one (1) serial number and a phone number to order more stuff.</div>
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<div dir="ltr">Period.</div>
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<div dir="ltr">I mean, silly me. For a couple of thousand bucks, I'd expected install media, release notes, some accompanying documentation. *SOMETHING* So I call the phone number and am like, "What in the world do I *do* with this??" They transfer me to another number. Which transfers me to another number. Which transfers me to another number. Who gives me a number they promise will be able to help. It's only after I hang up that I realize it's the first number I'd called -- the one on the piece of paper. At this point, I begin to doubt my sanity.</div>
<div dir="ltr">Oh -- and did I mention the ERP system, itself, cost something north of $150K, and I had the CFO breathing down my neck to get it installed, like, yesterday?</div>
<div dir="ltr">I finally find some poor woman who's at least, like, *heard* of COBOL. And she gets me to people who are willing to help me -- if I pay the $750 (? -- I think that's right) maintenance fee. So I do. And get connected with a very helpful engineer who explains the software is on the install media that *came with the system*; I just needed the serial number to activate it.</div>
<div dir="ltr">"Except, oh, yeah, YOUR version of the install media has a bug, and COBOL won't install. I need to mail you a file."<br />"So, you mean, even if I knew HP-UX super-duper well, I *STILL* wouldn't have been able to install it?"<br />"Yeah, that about sums it up."</div>
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<div dir="ltr">Again: release notes. Errata. An fscking URL. ANYTHING. I wrote our HP rep a letter the likes of which I generally try not to write. He called me up and asked what he could do to make it right. I said that was impossible, but implored him not to screw over other customers.</div>
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<div dir="ltr">That's a top-five most-frustrating-thing ever. I sincerely hope that things have changed in the intervening time.</div>
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<div dir="ltr">-Ken</div>
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<div dir="ltr">This stuff is from before my time but it's been really interesting to learn. Have any of you folks worked with this stuff? We're looking to migrate away eventually, maybe anyone with experience there? I'd love to hear any stories about COBOL or old enterprise mainframe applications you've worked with. We're probably going to be hiring soon too if anyone would be interested in a similar gig. :)</div>
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